What is child custody and visitation?

Child custody includes the right to make major life decisions about a child and the right to have the child in your care. Visitation is a secondary form of custody, which includes the right to visit with a child at times set forth in a court order, sometimes under specific conditions. “Visitation” is frequently used to refer to a person’s parenting time when it is relatively limited.

What is the difference between legal and physical custody?

Legal custody is the right to make major decisions about the child. Physical custody means the right to have the child in your physical care, either all the time or part of the time.  Both legal and physical custody can be either shared by the parents or held solely by one parent.

What do sole custody and joint custody mean?

A parent who has sole legal custody can make major decisions about the child’s life without consulting the other parent. If parents have joint legal custody, then they must consult one another and jointly make major decisions, such as where the child will attend school or whether the child will have a major medical procedure. If the parents cannot agree, a court may have to make the decision.

Sole physical custody means that the child lives with one parent only, though the child may visit with the other parent. Joint physical custody means that the child’s time is split between the parents. There are many possibilities for joint physical custody. One parent may have primary physical custody, meaning the child lives with that parent most of the time, while the other parent has secondary physical custody, for example, every other weekend, or regularly scheduled dinner visits. Alternatively, there may be an equal split in which the child alternates between the parents on a regular basis.

Am I required to get a custody order?

Parents who are no longer together are not required to get a custody order, but may choose to do so in case they do not agree about the child’s care. Non-parents do not need a custody order to provide temporary care for a child as long as the parents agree that the child will live with or be cared for by the non-parent. However, schools, medical providers or other third parties may require a custody order before allowing a non-parent to make decisions for a child. 

What happens if there is no custody order?

Both legal parents have equal rights to the child if there is no custody order. “Legal parents” are people officially recognized as parents on the child’s birth certificate, a court order such as a child support or adoption order, or an affidavit of parentage. Without a custody order, the rights of non-parents are much more limited, and the parents generally have the right to custody of the child.

What happens when the child turns 18?

At age 18, your child is legally an adult, and the courts no longer have the authority to order custody or visitation.

Does the law prefer one parent over the other?

No. Either parent can be awarded custody of a child of any age, depending on the family’s specific circumstances.

Does failing to pay child support affect a parent’s custody rights?

A parent’s custody rights do not depend on payment of child support, but on the type of relationship with the parent that is in the child’s best interests. A court may consider refusal to pay child support in its analysis of the parent’s ability to act in the child’s best interests.

What is an emergency custody order?

An emergency custody order, sometimes referred to as an “ex parte order,” is an immediate, short-term custody order that a judge can grant under limited emergency circumstances, without hearing from the other party. The grounds for granting emergency custody include situations in which a child is at a substantial risk of bodily injury, sexual abuse, or removal from North Carolina for the purpose of avoiding the authority of the North Carolina courts. Law enforcement can assist in recovering a child with an emergency custody order. If an emergency custody order is granted, a hearing must be scheduled so that both parties have the opportunity to be heard. You should consider hiring an attorney if you need to file for emergency custody, because the process is complex.

Filing for Custody

Who can file for child custody or visitation?

Any parent can file for custody, whether the parents are separated, divorced or never married. Third parties, such as grandparents, relatives, or others who have cared for the child, can file for custody or visitation under some circumstances. To obtain custody, non-parents must prove that the parents are either unfit to care for the child or have not acted in accordance with their rights as parents, for instance, by abandoning the child to be raised by a non-parent. Grandparents may also be awarded visitation in some circumstances when there is a custody case between the parents. Non-relatives requesting custody must prove that they have a substantial relationship with the child. 

How do I file for custody?

To ask a court for a child custody order, you must file a complaint. Your lawyer can file the complaint for you, or if you do not have a lawyer, you can file a complaint yourself.

Where should I file my custody case?

Custody cases must be filed in the child’s “home state,” which is the state where the child has lived for the six months before the case is filed. If you had a previous custody case about the same child in a different state, you generally must return to that state to change your custody order as long as one of the parties still lives there.

Within North Carolina, you may file a custody case in the county in which the child resides or is physically present or in a county where the parent resides.

What happens when I file for custody?

After you file your case, you must ensure that the summons and complaint are served on the other parent, generally either by the sheriff or through certified mail. A judge can only make decisions in your case after the other parent has been served with the summons and complaint.

Generally, before a judge can hear your case, it will be sent to the Custody Mediation Program.

I went to court for custody in the past, but the situation has changed. Can I file a new case?

If a judge signed a custody order in your earlier case, you will need to file to modify that order rather than filing a new case. In general, your Motion to Modify should be filed in the court that made the original decision. In some situations, if your previous case was dismissed, you can file a new custody case. See below for more information on modification.